“Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes
we are capable of change.”
Brené Brown
During the journey of self-discovery and personal growth, it's often the weight of guilt and the shadow of shame that holds us back. These emotions, like heavy anchors, can tether us to the past, preventing us from fully embracing our present and future. But what if we could transform these burdens into sources of strength? What if we could rise above the suffocating grasp of guilt and shame, and emerge empowered with self-love, self-respect and self-worth?
Guilt and shame are powerful emotions that stem from our perceptions of ourselves and our actions.
Guilt arises when we believe we have done something wrong or failed to meet our own or others' expectations. It's the nagging voice in our heads that reminds us of past mistakes, urging us to repent and make amends. On the other hand, shame goes deeper; it's not just about what we've done but who we believe we are. Shame tells us that we are inherently flawed, unworthy of love and acceptance.
In his book Power vs. Force, David R Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D has calibrated energy and emotions on a Scale of Consciousness, the illustration below outlines different emotions. The vibration of shame is the lowest level of frequency and accordingly is 'perilously proximate to death'.
Shame is often used as a tool of cruelty, generally, we all have some awareness as a child "losing face" with our peers.
Shame is a complex emotion that can manifest in various ways, impacting both our thoughts and behaviours.
Here are some common symptoms or signs of shame:
Intense Self-Criticism: Individuals experiencing shame often engage in harsh self-criticism, viewing themselves in a negative light and focusing on perceived flaws or shortcomings.
Feelings of Worthlessness: Shame can lead to feelings of deep-seated worthlessness or inadequacy, where individuals believe they are fundamentally flawed or unworthy of love and acceptance.
Isolation and Withdrawal: Shame often leads to a desire to withdraw from social interactions or isolate oneself from others, as individuals may fear judgment or rejection if their perceived flaws are exposed.
Avoidance of Eye Contact: People experiencing shame may avoid making eye contact with others, as they feel exposed or vulnerable.
Physical Symptoms: Shame can manifest as physical symptoms such as blushing, sweating, or rapid heartbeat, particularly in situations where individuals feel embarrassed or humiliated.
Defensiveness: Some individuals may respond to feelings of shame with defensiveness or aggression, lashing out at others as a way to protect themselves from further emotional pain.
Perfectionism: Shame often fuels perfectionistic tendencies, as individuals strive to avoid making mistakes or appearing vulnerable in order to protect themselves from experiencing shame.
Difficulty Accepting Compliments: People experiencing shame may have difficulty accepting compliments or praise from others, as they struggle to internalize positive feedback about themselves.
Depression and Anxiety: Chronic feelings of shame can contribute to the development of depression and anxiety disorders, as individuals struggle to cope with overwhelming feelings of self-doubt and worthlessness.
Self-Imposed Isolation: Shame can lead to self-imposed isolation, where individuals may withdraw from social activities or relationships in an attempt to avoid further feelings of embarrassment or humiliation.
You'll also see from the illustration above, that guilt is not much higher in frequency than shame and again, society also uses this emotion to manipulate and punish, often causing symptoms of victimhood.
These two emotions, guilt and shame are most often held in the lower body, the bladder, sexual organs, genitals all classic root chakra survival instincts. The root chakra, is the first primary energy center in the body according to various spiritual and energetic systems. It is located at the base of the spine and is associated with feelings of safety, security, stability, and survival.
When it comes to holding onto guilt and shame, the root chakra can be significantly affected as it governs our sense of safety and security in the world. When we experience guilt or shame, particularly if it's related to past experiences or trauma, it can create a sense of not good enough and/or not belonging feelings. These feelings can disrupt the balance of the root chakra, leading to feelings of fear, anxiety, and a lack of trust in ourselves and the world around us; which then creates energetic imbalances and possibly physical manifestations such as tension or discomfort in the lower back, hips, legs, or feet, as well as issues with digestion and elimination.
Guilt and shame often stem from deep-rooted beliefs about ourselves and our worthiness. These beliefs can become ingrained in the energy of the root chakra, creating blockages that prevent us from fully grounding ourselves in the present moment and feeling confident in who we are.
Our survival instincts can be activated, such as fight, flight, fawn or freeze causing us to feel on edge or hyper-vigilant as we navigate the world. This can further exacerbate feelings of insecurity and instability.
To address these low-frequency feelings of guilt and shame, it's important to engage in practices that promote healing and balancing; such as meditation, grounding exercises, spending time in nature and Introspective Breathwork® Therapy. It's then possible to begin cultivating a greater sense of self-worth, confidence, and resilience, allowing us to move forward with more ease and authenticity in our lives.
Here's the truth, we have the power to rise above guilt and shame. We have the ability to rewrite our stories, to reclaim our sense of worth and autonomy. It starts with acknowledging these emotions, recognizing their presence without judgment or condemnation. We must confront the narratives that we've internalized, challenging the belief that our worth is defined by our past mistakes or perceived shortcomings, feel where we are holding onto past experiences and living them out on the daily.
Central to our journey of empowerment is the practice of self-compassion and forgiveness. As a woman on the rise, we must learn to treat ourselves with the same kindness and understanding that we would offer to a friend. Instead of berating ourselves for our perceived failures, we can offer ourselves grace, recognizing that we are human, imperfect, and deserving of love. Through forgiveness, we release the grip of guilt and shame, allowing ourselves to heal and grow.
As we navigate the turbulent waters of guilt and shame, we cultivate resilience and inner strength. We discover that our worth is not defined by our past actions or the judgments of others. We realize that we are capable of growth and transformation, that our mistakes do not diminish our inherent value. With each step forward, we connect to our inner wisdom, reclaim our power, forging a path of authenticity and self-empowerment.
In the journey of life, we will inevitably encounter moments of guilt and shame. But remember this: you are not defined by your mistakes, nor are you bound by your sabotaging patterns. You have within you the power to rise above, to transform adversity into opportunity, and to emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than before. So embrace your journey, embrace your humanity, and rise above. For it is through the crucible of struggle that we find our true strength, our true purpose, and our true selves.
It's important to recognize that experiencing shame is a natural part of being human, but persistent or overwhelming feelings of shame may indicate a need for further exploration. During our H.E.R.E retreat we will be exploring sabotaging patterns of shame and guilt and neutralising experiences that bought them about.
Join us for a 3-day transformation journey to explore your inner wisdom to elevate your frequency and bring about self-empowerment, self-worth and self-love.
Introspective Breathwork™ Therapy offers holistic healing.
Join us for a virtual retreat in May 2024, at H.E.R.E. for support on your healing journey www.hereretreat.com.
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